Organizer's nightmare; DRAMA

There are days that I want to just sit on my bed, stuff my face in a pillow, and scream until my pillow is a doughnut. Those are my worst days. You can be assured; it is probably because I have encountered, yet again, another drama session.

If you organize enough members, for a long enough period of time, you'll find one. I have had my generous share of drama. To be honest, I do enjoy a bit of drama. Sorry to those organizers who believe playgroups can be 'drama free' but....you are dealing with social dynamics, and with that comes drama!!  Come on, truthfully, a little drama makes life interesting (Which is I why I believe God invented in-laws.).

There is never a surpreme way to handle it when it does rear it's ugly head, but there is plenty you can learn from it, and a positive attitude to have about it. Every helping of drama has taught me a different lesson. The best part, in my opinion is drama leads to something better; communicating. Drama is a door to communication; you just have to step through it.

Even if in the end the two sides do not agree, when true communication happens, both sides feel validated in their problem, and can have closure. I'm still not an expert on communication,  but here is what I've learned.

1. Stop, look, listen. You will never understand the other persons side unless you do this. You might as well listen to their side first because once they feel validated, they will listen to you!
2. Express your thoughts as they are 'your fault'.  I'm not saying they are your fault, but if you express them as your problem and your fault, the opposite party will give you their sympathy, and feel less threatened. Instead of saying "You never call be back when you say you will." say "I feel like I'm not a priority to be called back." It's okay to use the word 'you' occasionally, but I try to avoid it at all costs. It takes practice.
3. Remember that we are all human. Honestly, this is something someone said to me once as a joke when I told him I was mad at him. When I asked if they knew why, he said "for being human?". It struck a chord with me and I will never forget it. You know what the beautiful thing about being human is? We all have feelings!   

If you find the opposite party does not want to follow you through the door of communication, there are a few things you can do. Talk it out with someone outside of your circle. Give it time, that might be what he or she needs. Let go. If the person never comes around, you are going to have to realize you've tried your best, and that's all you can do. At least you stayed honest to yourself, and gave him or her the opportunity of friendship.

Drama can lead to better understanding, better communication, and better friends. It is not the enemy. I am definitely not encouraging one to grab a spoon and start stirring the pot, but if the pot is mixing, don't be afraid to taste what's cookin (Provided the meal is yours and not someone elses.)!