Discriminating? Or Exclusive?

An organizer made a mistake. A big mistake. "We're sorry to discriminate, but...." read the introduction prargraph of an online article about a group denying a stay at home dad membership to their playgroup. Whether or not that is what the infamous email read, it was the wrong way to put it.

Let me become Mr. Webster for a second.

Discriminate : a difference in treatment or favor on a basis other than individual merit

OK. Pperhaps they were discriminating. But isn't discrimination wrong? hmmm......

Let's say I'm going to a movie. I wanna invite someone. I choose a friend. Wait! did I just Discriminate? Maybe a neighbor I haven't met yet would like to go to a movie with me. OH darn...I just did it again. I forgot to ask my sister; who lives in Canada; so I'd have to wait until she could afford to visit me. Now I'm discriminating because of distance. Or is that because of income?

Back to being Mr. Webster.

Exclusive: excluding or having power to exclude

Yeesh....actually, I like the word discriminate better when it's put like that.

So, yes, I discriminate Dads from my playgroup. I am not ashamed. But I never use that particular word.  I  hope by putting this thought out there it will encourage other leaders to make discriminating choices. Why? Because when you do, you are filling a niche. Perhaps a mom is looking for moms with babies the same age as hers. Maybe you want to connect with Latin mothers.

Only child...
girls/boys only..
adopted children...
premature babies...
first time parents...
single parents....
young/older parents..
working moms...
at home dads...
homeschooling...
ethnic...
religious..
special needs....

The list doesn't end. The point is, by separating yourself in a niche you are free to express yourself on those issues which you might otherwise be uncomfortable expressing to others about..

So, discriminate away my friends.