Halloween party idea!

Today I am calling local active adult communities in hopes of landing an awesome event. Our Halloween party is taking place during the week; and we thought it would be fun to go trick or treating together. Seeing as this Halloween takes place on a Sunday it is going to be hard to do. Too many dads have to get up in the morning to go to work, and most go to church that day. Instead what we have come up with is throwing our party at an active adult community room, and trick or treating our residents....
How cool is that? Some of these resident have no families around and rarely see young kids.
Here is how I am planning to do this. Next week I will pass around door hangers giving the residents information about what day and tine we will trick or treat. If the resident wants to participate they can place the door hanger on their door they day of trick or treating. I also figured our door hanger should include volunteer info for our child care program in case they would interested. Retirees are perfect candidates to watch children for our mom's day off event; they are readily available on weekdays!

Hopefully the idea will work and I'll post a review in November!
Happy Halloween!

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Fitted Leaders

I am not the best playgroup organizer. I know I could do so much better than what I do. However, I do know that I was meant to be an organizer. I thoroughly enjoy what I do.  It's only natural for me to take on leadership positions in other mom's group as well, but I know my place.

I am an assistant coordinator for my military MOPS group. I love MOPS, but there are some positions in MOPS I could never fit no matter how hard I try. Discussion Group Leaders is one of them.

A Discussion Group Leader manages about 6-10 moms in a subgroup of MOPS. She initiates conversation, mediates it, maintains it, and help cultivate friendships within the intimate group. WAIT A MINUTE! Am I a walking hypocrite?I can organize a mom's group but I can't innate conversation, mediate it, and maintain it? I can't help cultivate friendships? Sure I can. However, I would have to avoid a few strong personalities traits I have.

Sometimes I'm overwhelming. My personality gets to be too much around certain people. In conversations, I tend to dominate it, not nurture it. I know this; and I am working on it; but it's a natural instinct, so I just don't think that I would do as well as others in the position. My Discussion Group Leader in a different MOPS is pretty quiet, she has no problem with letting others have their say. She also is encouraging, and can jump in if the conversation starts to die. She keeps the group balanced. That is a good discussion group leader, and why I would could not do well. I like the spot light too much.

I could never lead a MOPS group either. My assistant coordinator position is the highest I can ever go, because while I am Christian, I am not someone destined to enlighten others. I'm very opinionated when it comes to religion, and MOPs is a Christian organization, but supports mothers of all religions. I know that I could not fulfill the Christian leadership correctly.

So where does lead to? What I am trying to say is that when you are looking for assistants, you need to know first what personalities and qualities that will fit the role. Sometimes it will be easy; like a finance person must be good with numbers, and balancing a budget. However some positions are a little more tricky. So here are come questions you can use to help figure out selecting your playgroup leaders! Happy organizing!

Questions
What is the leaders duties?
What personality traits is best for this?
Who is going to work closely with them?
What experience do they have?
What is the person's strength and weaknesses?

Recipe: Rice Mice

This recipe's orginal credit goes to familyfun.com. Unfortunetly, their instructions were not percise, and it left you with no idea how much of rice, cream cheese, and yogurt to use.

So we did some playing around. I choose to use string cheese for the tails instead of the chives. I also decided to use fresh sugar snap peas because I thought the kids would like snapping them apart. After cooking the rice and letting it cool, I tried mixing the rice with cream cheese. I used 2-3 tablespoons of fcream cheese, and 1 cup of  rice. I left out the yogurt because i cooked the rice in chicken broth, and didn't have any yogurt..so I figured it would taste good anyway.

Check out some the pictures from the playdate! Enjoy!

A Closer Look: Social Toddler

Social Toddler is a site specifically made for parenting your preschoolers (toddlers) and bring them out into social atmospheres. You can search, and run your own playgroup, find activites to do. Unfortunetly,  I am not very impressed.

Besides having a very limited system in comparison with other website I've used for organizing playgroup, social toddler does not compete well with search engine optimization. Plain an simple; for you non-geeky moms, that means when your search for 'playgroups' with your local area will not come up high in the list-- you are not going to get as much traffic as cafemom or meetup.com.

I have hopes. If it grows successfully, it will add in new features, and find new things to do in other local areas. Social Toddler does not cover my area; Spokane.

OK. Perhaps I'm bias. Check it our for yourself it may be what you are looking for!

Diversity!!

One thing that I love about playgroups is the opportunity to teach our children to be accepting of diversity. I've had trouble with acceptance in the past. When I was young, I had trouble being friendly to dark races; especially black. I still have problems knowing how to act around people with special needs.

I've been fortunate enough to meet mothers of different heritages. I met a mom whom came from the Netherlands, a couple originally from England, some from Canada. I've met blacks, Hispanics, Indian, and orientals. I've met mothers of special needs children.

One of my assistants has a sister with autism. I admit the first time I met her, I was uncomfortable (almost three years ago now!). I did my best to set the example for my children. Several months ago, we had a family of a special needs child join the playgroup. Although this is not the first time we had a special needs child join the group; this family stood out. This mother is super-mom. This child is no different that any other child in our playgroup.

I am happy to say that I am now overcoming my uncertainty of diversity. I have found that these special people; mothers, fathers, children; can teach us so much more than just acceptance. They teach us about life. They teach us about happiness. They teach about love. My heart is connected to all of them, and I hope I pass my love for them onto my children.

Participating in playgroups gives a family multiple advantages. Teaching children (and even ourselves) about acceptance of differences is a great one. If you ever have the opportunity, embrace the chance with open arms. Believe me, you'll be glad you did.

Group Rules

One question that a lot of newbie organizers ask is what 'rules' they should use for their group. I can tell you right now, I don't know. Every group is different. Ultimately, it depends on you and what you want out of your group. So here are the questions you need to ask yourself;

Are you going to organize on or offline?

If your organize offline, you'll need to have a regular meeting day, time, and place. You'll have to print out schedules, and a phone list for your members.

Online groups tend to have members that fall off the map or slack in parcipation. Some online groups have rules regarding consistant activity in playgroups, online activity, or RSVPs.

Do you have a set time and day or do you want diversity?

If you are planning on having multiple days, times, and places, you may want to also insure your attendance follows through. Many groups, esp. online groups may have an attendance requirement of attending so many playgroups in a certain time frame (for example, once every month.)

Do want a large group, or small group?

Some leaders want to inlcude everyone that would like to join. Some want to ensure they are really going to get to know all the members. To do so, organizers will limit the memberships and require their attendance to be frequent. The downside to this that members do grow out or graduate out of groups and finding new members might be harder than anticipated.

Is your group diverse in religious beliefs, race, culture, ethinicity?

Unfortnetly diversity can also bring about conflict. It can be toxic and may need to be controlled.  I am not saying groups should divide into pregigious arch-rivals. Sometimes diversity promotes growth and understanding; which is a good thing. If I remember correctly, the phrase from A Day No Pigs Will Die; "Fences bring men together". If your purpose for joining or running a playgroup is to connect with individual families who carry a specific simiularity like religion or race, by all means; state this in your group rules.


How should allergies, sicknesses,  and chronic diesases be handled?

Sometimes children can be deathly allergic to foods, such as peanuts, where even the smell can hurt them. When it comes to sickness, some families are very concerned about exposure, while others do not even shudder at continuious coughing and running noses. The question organizers should consider is how to handle allergies should the issue come up. Should all members be unable to bring certain foods? Is there a process in place for emergencies? Should members with specific allergies be excluded from certain activities?

Is solitation allowed in the group?

Many moms try to supplement income by running businesses out of their home. On occasion, you will find a mom joining seemingly only interested in promoting their business. If this is a concern for your group, you may want to develop rules for this, and the concequences for violation.

In the beginings of my adventures in organizing, I believed that rules were needed. Two years ago, I had enough of rules, and tried to organize as rule-free as possible. I'm still trying to find a happy medium. I can say this--if you choose to implement rules, you MUST apply them to everyone in the group; You must have consquences and you must follow through them as well. Otherwise you'll end up with a half-baked group and two eggs short of a waffle.

Stay tuned for more on advice on groups guidelines in the weeks to come!!! Happy Organizing!!

Media and Playgroup Discrimnation

Time for a personal, emotional post. It never crossed my mind that I would EVER want to write about this, but I had an epipheny as I was brushing my teeth last night. This is something that desperately needs to get out there.

It is completely natural to protect our children from threats; but aren't we going a tad bit overboard? I'm not talking about rubbing sanitizer on our hands or even putting on those grocery cart covers. I'm talking about extreme measures we take; like not allowing them to use the public restroom, or play in a community pool because of the possibility of germs.

THIS (not quite) JUST IN: germs are everywhere. Do you know how many germs at in an ER room? You  don't avoid taking your child to the ER if they are extrememly sick do you? For your child's sake I hope not. Why is it that our children's phyiscal health so much more important than their mental and emotional health? I'm serious. If you limit your child from participating in fun activities because of germ, you are limiting them from enjoying the life that you strive so hard to preserve.

Media hype tend to send people in a whirlwind frenzy. Even blood relatives did not want to visit with me for fear of getting 'infected' (Since when did I become a walking diease?) Here's where I get rather upset. I was removed from a playgroup (over a year ago now!) because the leader considered me a 'threat'. At the time, I was struggling with relaspes from an infectious diesase. Normally removal is a matter of unreconcible differences, or violating guidelines; which is understandable. This dismisal is completely out of line because;

• I never attended a playdate if I had an active infection
• I am very good about keeping hands clean and santized
• My household members have been free of infections (at the time) for over a year! (Now it's almost two years! I might also add I am cured, but no--I'm not rejoining that playgroup).

"I don't feel comfortable........ Afterall, I have a newborn to think about" the leader emailed. YEAH. At the time, I was eight months pregnant; I also had a newborn to think about. Doctors assured me I have nothing to worry about. "From things I've read and talking to family members who agree, I'm going to ask that you and your children do not attend playdates."

So here's my bone and I'm gonna pick it. Should we limit who our families interact with because of their health history for 'chance' of becoming infected? Absolutely Not! Ask any doctor, and they will tell you, unless your child is a specail health risk, you are more at risk by going to the grocery store than by playing with someone with a history.

So.....stop freaking out about the latest Media hype. The people being hospitalized for it is only a small percentage, and most of those infected experience a very mild case. If you educate yourself on the symptoms and follow directions to prevent, you shouldn't have a problem. AND If you are really concerned talk to your family doctor-- not the media.

Attendance Policy

Today we are talking about rules! More specifically Attendance Policies.

Who needs an attendance policy:

• a group with low attendance or
• a group with limited space or
• a group that provides childcare and number of caregivers are limited
• a group looking to 'sell' their group for sponsors or
• a group looking for committed members

What is it:

Basically it is a group rule that stipulates a member attend a certain number of events in a certain time period. Some groups have a 'attend once a month policy', and others have a "miss three events and you're out". There is no perfect amount because it depends on your groups dynamics.

How it works:

This the way I worked my attendance policy (I don't use one anymore): My group meets every weekday, so I used to require that members attend once a month. At the beginning of the month I would pull out my member roster and star everyone's name who has RSVPd for the month. Those that have no stars I would write an email reminding them to find an event to come to.

Mid week, I would once again, pull out my roster. This time, I would cross out any names who have already attended an event. and I would bullet anyones name who is RSVPd for the upcoming events this month. I then write another email to those who have not RSVPd to anything, and to those who have not come to anything yet; even if they are RSVPd.

At the end of the month, I cross off all members who have attended an event and email the rest, asking if they are well, and if they need any help, because they have not attended an event and we are worried about them. I also let them know that we've sent out emails this month to them, and haven't heard back, so if we do not hear back within three days, we will excuse them from membership.

Note, I do not like removing members, but it may be a necessary action if you want to meet your group goals. Decide with your leadership team what actions you wish take at each situation.

Attendance policies help foster stronger friendships, and make the group come together. Once you decide what you want for your group, you can decide if an attendance policy is the right way to go.

Ickie Sickies

It's three a.m. You should be sleeping. Instead you are cleaning, washing, and administering medicine. Yup. Your child is sick. As much as I am sure that you love taking care of your child, there is nothing like the fear of helplessness as you watch your child throw up the rest of dinner. I can't tell you how many times I've gone through the ickie sickies with my children.

Regardless of what anyone says, germs are no more dangerous if they come from a playgroup or from your grocery store. A germ is a germ, no matter where it came from. Breeding grounds of germs should not scare you from attending playdates.

However, control is something you should and can do. Here are tips for keeping your playgroup healthy.

• Implement a sick policy and make sure your members know it.
• Block off non-play areas for the children. Sanitze the area before the playdate, and any toys that can be sanitized as well.
• Make sure you have hand sanitizer available, as well as soap and water.
• Wash hands when appropiate
• Keep any foods at apropiate temps.
• Stay educated on current health concerns, and ask a doctor if concerned.

Keep these simple tips in mind, and you playgroups will be healthy as can be! Happy Playing!






I would do anything to prevent my children from getting sick. Anything.









At playgroups it's essential to make sure it's a healthy environment. Make use of these tips to keep your playgroups healthy.









Implement a Sick Policy

Clean and Sanitize toys if : they have been mouthed, or come in contact with sick children (so if you are hosting and your toys have not been sanitized since the last sickness epidemic, time to haul out the bleach.)

Keep hand sanitizer around. Use after playdates

Have a place for diaper changes.

If food is at the playdate, follow regular precautions. (wash hands, don't let food spoil, etc)

Sick Policy









I do not know many playgroup organizers who do not have a sick policies. Like it or not kids go hand and hand with germs. The written rules differ from group to group, but I've provided mine for an example. I've added my comments in a separate color for more detailed explanation. Share yours with us too!!!









M.A.M.A.









We hate to see our little ones get sick. To keep everyone healthy please stay at home









If you or a child become ill. This can be anything from a fever to just not acting well. I cannot tell you how many times a child wound up being sick at a playdate. Common stories would be "They were fine this morning, or Gosh I didn't know they were sick." Further digging would reveal that the child acting sluggish in the morning, or didn't eat breakfast, acting extra fussy.

Has bodily fluid symptoms. This included, but not limited to vomiting, severe diarrhea, etc. Remember that you do not have to have a fever to be sick. Some moms will ignore the symptom if there is no fever!

Has had a fever above 99 degrees in the past 24 hours. Sometimes a parent will give a child fever reducers like tylenol or motrin, and then see their temp go down, so they think it will be fine to attend the playdate the next morning. Only to find the next morning at the playdate, that the fever is not gone.

Has a contagious disease including but not limited to pink eye, fifth, chicken pox. Please ask a doctor before returning to playgroups. Obviously you can't be sure the parent did this, but it is a nice suggestion.

Recipe Time: Cinnamon Tortillas

I was first introduced to this concept when I was in elementary school. Another family went on a fishing trip with us, and brought these along. The thing I find so appealing is children can easily make them, building valuable spreading and folding skills later on.  (The picture BTW I had a hard time making the butter and cinnamon sugar show up because the kids didn't get it all out on the edges! LOL. So instead I just stacked them and put sugar and cinnamon on top.

Cinnamon Tortillas

• cinnamon and sugar mixture
• butter or cream cheese
• tortillas
• spreading sticks (popcycle sticks for young children, plastic if they are preschool age)

Allow the kids to spread the butter or cheese on the tortilla. Cinnamon mixture can be put on two different ways: 1. spoon it on and then dump loose sugar on to a cookie tray. 2. use a shaker container

Fold the tortilla onto itself making it a long holdable roll up. Enjoy!

A Closer Look: Meetup.com

A quick Internet search anywhere for "moms groups" will bring you to meetup.com website; usually within the top three. Meetup is where I got my start, it is safe to say, I'm bias. But not blind. So I thought I would review the website I use today!


First Look

At first look the website appears fairly simple. I assure you, it's not that simple. Once you create a an account and join a group it looks like a normal 'group' website. However, once you take on an organizer (Organizers pay $19 a month, or less with other payment plans) role it becomes complicated.



The best part about meetup is the search engine optimization. If a moms were to google "Moms group in Chicago, IL" or the like, one of the first links would be to meetup.com. This feature alone makes it worth it to me to pay for the use. I usually get two-three new members a month just from this alone.



Calendar Features

The calendar allows members to veiw events in a list, or on a monthly calendar. Organizers can add the address, notes, pictures, maps, links, set specific to RSVPs and noticfications (like not allowing maybe RSVPs, and emailing the organizer when someone rsvps), ask questions when members RSVP, and even has options for payment if the event costs money. There is even manual and automatic waiting lists if you select RSVP limit is filled. Organizers can edit, copy, and email members related to that event (those who have rsvpd yes and/or no, and/or those who have not RSVPd.).

The calendar also allows you add notes, and make draft events.

Adminstration Tools


The organizer has the ability to select privacy levels, and how members join (automatially join, request permission, etc.). There is so much to go over, but the group has it's own 'webaddress' or you can use your own domain. The webiste also has a group forum, which the organizer can organize into folders, and adjust prviacy levels. There is also a photo section, mailing list, polls section, and the about page (for non members to learn about the group).






The organizer can also appoint other admintstrators to the group. The options are as follows:

co-organizer- can adjust everything the organizer does, except for the payment for the subscription.

assistant organizer- can do everything the organizer does, with the exception of group settings (privacy levels, welcome letter, etc.)

Event Organizers can only control events. They cannot set up polls, or edit the message board forums.

Member Even Organizers- members who are select to take of one event. They cannot touch any other events on the calendar.


Support


There are many vitual support groups in the 'organizer category' that are happy to offer support and guidence. A quick search in the website's search bar under "Organizer" will pull up many groups for this. Meetup headquarters is stationed in New York, so techinical support is available eastern time. The email for support is support@meetup.com


The downside is it can be complicated to figure out. Even with the weath of features I mentioned, the site has a lot more available. It also has a fee for organizing. With that fee you can run three groups, if you choose, but believe me, three is a lot to handle. Meetup does have a 30 day money back garentee. So there is no risk in trying it out.
 Happy organizing!

Pizazz Your Playgroup

Giving your Playgroup a bit of pizazz

Sometimes a playgroup meeting regularly for the same activities can become very routine. In fact it can even put you in a rut. Members may start to lose interest, or the group may lose some enthusiasm. But never fear! There are plenty of things you can do to add a bit of pizazz to your playgroup.

•Theme
Your playgroups don't have to be just 'come over and play'! Add a theme!! It could be something simple from doing a 'teddy bear picnic', where children bring a teddy bear and mom brings a picnic item and everyone meets at a local park. Or it can be a full scale Luau themed party! It's all up to you!

•Food
Food is something anyone cannot do without. When it's good food, it attracts a great social atmosphere. Instead of supplying a regular snack, consider having a potluck for 'best or famous recipes'. Everyone loves to have people rave about their dishes, and everyone loves to indulge once and while.

•Activities

Structured Activities are appealing to parents and preschoolers. Children learn through play. By giving them an unusual activity in a group setting, you are giving the opportunity to learn in a group environment. Preschoolers would be thrilled with making craft projects, learning to play rhythms on instruments, etc. However, these activities may be a bit advanced for an infant or toddler. Remember-- It doesn't have to be complicated!!!! You can make a fun activity just out of old (but clean) adult socks. For example, Toddlers love learning how to dress themselves. Large socks makes it easy for them to get their feet into. They are learning an important skill, while getting enjoyment out of playing with mommy and daddy's socks. For Preschoolers, who are learning to group things in categories, you have them separate them from darks and lights, or match pairs of socks together!
Here are some more ideas for activities for you playgroups:

Circle time activities

Parachutes games

playing with puppets

dress up

sensory play (i.e. play dough, silly putty, sand)


•Places

Do you remember the excitement of riding in the car on the way to zoo when you were a child? Was there a special place that your parent's or your school would make a trip to? There are alot of local attractions just waiting to be visited! Your playgroups do not have to be limited to your home! Check your phone book under the categories Attractions, or Children's or Entertainment , and you may stumble on local resources you didn't know about. Ask around from your members about fun places they go. Then call and ask the facility about having an event there! Things you'll need to know:

◦The capacity of the space if you will be secluded to one room
◦The price of admission, parking, etc.
◦Discounts if they are available
◦Operation days and hours
◦Ask about having a private play date at the facility
◦If food is allowed
◦What you are required/ or suggested to bring

Once you have a good idea about the venue, plan your event. You may want to coordinate it with the facility. By doing so, you can avoid a lot of potential problems. Some of the most common problems are

• members getting lost or not finding the group
• the staff of the facility being unprepared for the extra boost in attendance that day
• the facility being closed due to operation changes, weather, or high attendance (facility gets filled)

Keeping in Contact with your venue is always a good idea. Here are the suggested tips for corresponding with your venue:

• When first approaching a new venue, tell them about your group, who you are, your experience, and then your interest in their service. Ask them the necessary questions.
• Let them know about your first event with them, even if you don't have to reserve space. Just in case you happen to have another group meeting there too.
• A week before the event call and give them a reminder and estimate how many will come.
• The day before, do a confirmation call and tell them the final head count.
• A week after, thank them for the event and try to schedule your next one if interested.
• Once a quarter, double check with the venues information (ie. open and close times, prices, etc)

Happy Playing!

Original Group Names; Easy as 123!

Need help picking a name? If you are looking for the perfect name, here are tips!

1. Location, Location, Location!
Think about your group and locations associated with it. It doesn't have to mean your city's name. Perhaps you are limiting your group to a certain neighborhood? Maybe you meet reoccurring at your favorite park? Perhaps you'd like to open it to people within your county or even your state! (wow!) Make a list of all the possible locations you can use for your group name.

2. Adjective!!


If you could think of one word that describes your group, what would it be? Fun? Awesome? Creative? Active?...Write down as many as you can think of, then see what fits best with your group's name.

3. Who?


With any group, people need to know who you are. For example, everyone knows when they walk into a red hat ladies convention, that they shouldn't expect to see young men wearing red hats! Why? Because the word ladies is in their group's name. Whether your group is for walkers, parents, young moms,etc, stating it your name will help people understand what's your groups about. And don't limit yourself to one choice, look it up in a thesaurus and find similar words too!
Once you've taken these three steps you've got a basis to start your name out on. Here are some examples of group names made from the advice above:

Hayford&2nd Fabulous Friends
Eastside Active Moms and Kids
Cheney's Child Connection

Organizer's nightmare; DRAMA

There are days that I want to just sit on my bed, stuff my face in a pillow, and scream until my pillow is a doughnut. Those are my worst days. You can be assured; it is probably because I have encountered, yet again, another drama session.

If you organize enough members, for a long enough period of time, you'll find one. I have had my generous share of drama. To be honest, I do enjoy a bit of drama. Sorry to those organizers who believe playgroups can be 'drama free' but....you are dealing with social dynamics, and with that comes drama!!  Come on, truthfully, a little drama makes life interesting (Which is I why I believe God invented in-laws.).

There is never a surpreme way to handle it when it does rear it's ugly head, but there is plenty you can learn from it, and a positive attitude to have about it. Every helping of drama has taught me a different lesson. The best part, in my opinion is drama leads to something better; communicating. Drama is a door to communication; you just have to step through it.

Even if in the end the two sides do not agree, when true communication happens, both sides feel validated in their problem, and can have closure. I'm still not an expert on communication,  but here is what I've learned.

1. Stop, look, listen. You will never understand the other persons side unless you do this. You might as well listen to their side first because once they feel validated, they will listen to you!
2. Express your thoughts as they are 'your fault'.  I'm not saying they are your fault, but if you express them as your problem and your fault, the opposite party will give you their sympathy, and feel less threatened. Instead of saying "You never call be back when you say you will." say "I feel like I'm not a priority to be called back." It's okay to use the word 'you' occasionally, but I try to avoid it at all costs. It takes practice.
3. Remember that we are all human. Honestly, this is something someone said to me once as a joke when I told him I was mad at him. When I asked if they knew why, he said "for being human?". It struck a chord with me and I will never forget it. You know what the beautiful thing about being human is? We all have feelings!   

If you find the opposite party does not want to follow you through the door of communication, there are a few things you can do. Talk it out with someone outside of your circle. Give it time, that might be what he or she needs. Let go. If the person never comes around, you are going to have to realize you've tried your best, and that's all you can do. At least you stayed honest to yourself, and gave him or her the opportunity of friendship.

Drama can lead to better understanding, better communication, and better friends. It is not the enemy. I am definitely not encouraging one to grab a spoon and start stirring the pot, but if the pot is mixing, don't be afraid to taste what's cookin (Provided the meal is yours and not someone elses.)!

Peanut Free Playgroups

My daughter attends a peanut free kindergarten classroom. This means there will be no PB&J sandwiches this year. It's alright with me, but I have an advantage; I've been avoiding peanut butter for a while now. Thankfully we did find out that she is not allergic to peanuts, but even so, her kindergarten classroom has five children who are. One of the children is deathly allergic--- meaning if they even smell it they can have a reaction.

The child care facilities I worked at also have peanut free policies--- peanut allergy is becoming a major concern....but is it concern enough to make your playgroup peanut-free? If your group is small, it will be relativity simple to just ask the parents about allergies. If your group is large, however, it gets tricky.

When I lived in Tucson, I ran a military moms group, and mentioned that peanut butter items would not be allowed at potlucks because of my daughter. I also asked the group of 30 moms if any of their children had allergies so we could be aware of them.

Little did I know that a drama mama was just waiting to attack! "That's not fair. My children won't eat much, they are picky eaters...It's unreasonable to tell me my children need to starve because your child has an allergy."

OK. In my defense, I only said potlucks. I didn't want *all* the children to have something with peanut butter and tell my one year old daughter she couldn't. Now she's five, and understands (sort of) what an allergy is. Since my daughter's allergy is not life-threatening I had no problem if we had a brown bagged our lunches and someone brought along a PB&J. What if it was life-threatening?

This is the way I've handled it, and I'll continue to handle it, but it's not the only way. Since we meet up multiple times a week, I put a disclaimer on any event that involves food. If your child has a food allergy and you wish to attend this playdate, please inform the organizer.

Plain and simple. It's the responsibility of the parent. Why shouldn't it be? For the three years we thought my daughter had an allergy I made sure she stayed away from it. If other people are involved there is a larger possibility for mistakes.

Here are some common allergy foods (pictured above):

Wheat
Milk
Eggs
Peanuts
Soy
Shellfish

So, what happens if you need to adjust? The best way is to talk to the parent. For the longest time I used almond butter in place of peanut butter. Then I found soy butter, and I love it! Most parents will know a possible substitute if the original cannot be used. You'll also have to find out how allergic the child is for safety measures.

If all else fails, fall back on your leadership team for a voted decision. Remember not every group is the same, and while one group might be allergen free another group may not. So whether your group is allergen free or not there is probably a group the opposite of you close by.

In your town: Petting Zoos!

If you are living in a large metropolis area in the united states, you are bound to have a petting zoo within two hours of your city. I say that with confidence because even though we do have one in our area, the business is not the best with customer service or organization. Trust me, we've tried it three times. Each time the playgroup has left with a bad taste their mouth.

So I have been on the hunt for a petting zoo relatively close to our city. The long search had left me discouraged, and disappointed. Until one day, I was at a local grocery store, and noticed a flyer for "kids day". I noticed it was going to have a petting zoo there. At first I thought it was the local petting zoo, but I figured it did not hurt to ask. The least they could tell me it that it is the same petting zoo we've been using.

So I asked.

This petting zoo is also close to our home, and is not an 'officail' business. But it had everything a petting zoo could offer. The ladies were amazing! This kids had a great time.

A few weeks later I noticed an ad on craigslist about a kids day at a local day care. Kind of like a promotion for business, but nonetheless it also offered a petting zoo. So I once again asked. Turns out the event used someone who had two rabbits, a tortoise, and a duck. OK, maybe it's a horse shy of a petting zoo, but still the kids would have fun.

My point is, you don't have to have an actual petting zoo around to get the petting zoo experience. Keep your eyes peeled, and you may find petting zoos in your own backyard. Ask around; word of mouth leads you to wonderful things.  If all else fails maybe someone will have an uncle or grandparent to raises llamas, and goats. Kids are not really too picky about the animals they see.

Stay at Home Mom's Guide to Playgroups

As much as I would like to share my secrets of succesful organizing, I have an ugly shelfish side. I really do NOT want to share this book with anyone. I cannot tell you how many times I've opened this book.... ok, ok. Enough taunting.

Anyone who even thinks about setting up a playgroup needs The Ultamite Stay At Home Mom's Guide to Playgroups by Carren Joye. It's just a no-brainer. If you look at all the Mom's groups books in bookstores, you'll find very few: this is the best choice.
The other books do not cover the organizing side of playgroups as well. Plain and Simple. You can find many books on activities for children under kindergarten age it's ridiculous. Many 'playgroup' books take these ideas, throw them together, and call it by that name. It may breifly talk about running groups, or whatnot, but it does not go into details. Carren's book is the most detailed book out there.

However; I do have complaints. It doesn't really touch enough on drama. Perhaps that is because Carren's playgroups never reached the multitude that online playgroups are. Perhaps, I and my fellow organizers that I've met so far, are just drama-mamas.

Nevertheless, it's a good jumping off book. I just hope that you still have questions afterward to relay to me!

Just can't say no.

I have a real soft spot for playgroups. I am a marshmallow for military wives who have young children. Last July on of members posted a link on facebook that the air force base MOPS needed coordinators. I just could not say no! Despite my insanely active playgroup, I have decided to dedicate my Thursdays to Fairchild AFB MOPS.

My husband is a military man- This summer he will reach his twenty years of service and hopefully retire. I am proud to say I know the ins and outs of the base procedures, and how Tricare (health insurance) works, and whatnot. I know what TDY stands for and what a BOP is, etc. etc. etc. But the thing I treasure the most about the military is the strong men and women and children, and what give to us.

If I have the opportunity to support them I will. It's just one more piece of broccoli, right?

Warning! Your kids will grow up!

My personal pet peeve of playgroup leaders is designing a playgroup that they will grow out of in a few years. Some may natural grow into changes, but if the group continues to recruit members overtime, eventually your children will outgrow your own playgroup!

I absolutely HATE to see a group labeled "for mothers of babies under a year" or "for the age of two". News Flash; One year goes by quickly as a mother. I mean, come on; it's ridiculous to work hard building a group you will be forced to abandon the following year.

My playgroups are all inclusive ages, provided the mother has one child under five years old. My daughter started kindergarten this year, but I still have two more, and it will be another five years until all of my children graduate from the group.

The other day I sat down to do planning for the fall calendar and I began to roughly layout our field trips. Working the trips around my kindergartner's schedule is a little difficult. I became very sad when I realized that many of the things we have planned for the playgroup she won't be able to attend.

Then I slapped my hand on my head!

Gah! I've done the same thing I complain about in other organizers! My child is outgrowing the playgroup! Not that it is a bad thing. LOL. In any case, I am seriously considering the age limits to be "born in 2005 or under" or "between 2005-2010 and their respective siblings".--that way we never grow out of it. Lame. I know.

So I wanted to give a shout out to all you playgroup leaders who have age limits on your playgroups. Reality check; When your child or you outgrow the playgroup: Are you going to let it go?

Dividing the Group

If your group is significantly large, you may consider seperating the groups by age, location, or other classifications that seem logical and unbiased. Seperating does mean the group cannot ever meet as a whole, but will give a chance for moms and kids to get to know some regular faces.

Seperating by age is a good choice for moms looking to meet a specific child's age group. You can divide the groups into non-mobile, wobblers, toddlers, and preschoolers. Many groups that divide groups up name their groups by categories of something else, uniting them with a common theme. For example, a group may classify this way:

Rainbow Playgroup

Red group: All ages
Organe group: non mobile babies
Yellow group: crawlers
Green group: Wobblers
Blue Group: Toddlers
Purple Group: Preschool

You can use all sorts of categories like fruit or vegetables, animals, art, etc. Details can even be divided further if the group is very large. You can have a birdie playgroup and divide groups by naming different categories of birds. Then further divide by age (Hatchlings, younglings, waddlers, flyers, etc).

Dividing by location is a bit tricky, but the easiest way is to seperate by zip code (if you are in the U.S.).

Make sure when you divide into groups that each group has a leader; someone to take care of things if you do not fall into the category. If your group starts to decrease in size you can also eliminate groups as well. If there is was thing that is true all groups change with time. When organizers adapt to those changes the group will thrive. Keep up on toes, and you'll never miss a beat! Happy Organizing!

Finding Members for your group Online

The biggest problem for many groups, especially groups that are small or just starting out, is enrolling members. How does one find others like his or herself? Without a clue about Marketing or Advertising, I gave it my all, and I can say from experience that for any social group word of mouth produces the best results (We'll cover that later!).

But for argument's sake, let's assume that you have no one to spread the word. So what do you do?

First you have to make your group visible. Get your group's website an individual address.  Godaddy is the provider I use; it's not expensive, and not too hard to figure out how to link it. Submit your website to search engines like Google, and Yahoo.

Now the real work begins. Start linking your web address to other high visibility websites. Find blogs that on remotely relating to your group, and see if they accept guest bloggers. Write articles for some article websites like ezarticles and put the link to your group in the signature. This will strengthen your visibility on search engines.
Let's realize that the Internet is our friend. Although it can be a risky place to put information, organizers can control the amount of information released. It can be as simple as an advertisement of a playgroup, simply stating, please write to this email if interested. Then these responses can be collected and emailed more information or a phone number to call.

If advertising online, there are many approaches to doing so.

Social Media.

It's the new wave of advertising word of mouth. Social Media has even been accused of out-doing google ads, the top online provider in advertisement. Something as simple as starting a facebook fanpage or twitter account can roll out some new members. Just be sure to keep your followers updated on all the cool stuff your group does!

Online Classifieds

More places to advertise items for free are popping up. Craigslist has a place designated for groups specifically, but you may find free classifieds on your local newspapers/station's websites.

Online Groups

Online groups are becoming a major part of online social activity. Many places like google or yahoo allow anyone with an account to start one. Facebook and Meetup.com also do any type of social group you might be looking to start.

For playgroups specifically check out these sites:

cafemom.com
iplaygroups.com
raisingthem.com
socialtoddler.com
playgroupsusa.com

A word about invite etiquette

I am a big supporter of 'the more the merrier' and 'everyone's invited' attitude. However, inviting members of other groups to join yours may be offensive to other group organizers. Remember that they have worked to get the amount of members they have, and there is a possibility that they will see an innocent invite as an indication that his or her group is not 'good enough'.

If you intend to invite members from another group, ask the organizer his or her feelings first. Make sure that when you invite members that you keep your main intentions of joining that group to participate, and not simply solicit your own group.

Closer Look; Cafe Mom

Cafe Mom is a website bringing moms together. It's main purpose is not to support groups; however this is the part I would like to write about. Cafe mom allows it's members to create groups for free. They can be local, or virtual.  The nice thing is they can be made private so there is no risk there.

Setting up a group event is easy. One thing I like is the category it will list for your event. You can set it to 'virtual' or 'in person' or 'playdate', etc. It allows you to set the date, and start and end time and address. Once posted, an RSVP and comment tracker is on the event page.  I personally do not like the fact that members can RSVP maybe.

The site will also have forums, chat, photos albums, and a member list.  Administration tools allow the organizer to select privacy, invite people via friend's email, and members of cafe mom that you have already befriended.

The one thing that I LOVE about cafe mom is the support group they have for administers. You have to join the group, but they have topics about getting your group to grow, and how to handle certain situations. Support is the number one thing that keeps the organizer going. It is such a valuable thing to have.

The main reason why I don't organize religiously on cafemom is because it is a free website. I know, sounds like I'm backward. Since the website is free the website's income in generated from advertisements. It really clogs up the screen page, and plenty of them are animated at that!

Another thing is cafemom's groups do not have high visibility on search engines. While cafemom does come up frequently in searches, there is still a difficultly for new members to find your group. Like I said before, cafemom is not just about groups. If one makes their way to the group section, I don't think they will spend enough time on the section to find the group.

OK. Let's wrap this up. Here is a list of pros and cons.

PROS

•  It's free
• Easy event management
• has online communication abilities

CONS

• ads
• low visibility
• not specifically met for groups

All together, cafemom is a great place to run a playgroup if you have a few members to begin with. If you are starting from scratch you'll find that it will be difficult to grow. Either way, it is just one of the very few options out there!

Not a typical Storytime!

I can not tell you, how much I hate storytimes! For the parent of a wildly active child (like myself), you add a free spririted child, one large empty room, and an inexperienced (or uneducated) storytime volunteer it becomes madness.  They just can't keep your child interested the entire 20 mintues or half an hour. However depsite my personal feelings about storytime, they are a great staple to attend with playgroups.  Barnes and Noble in particular.

At some locations, Barnes and Noble includes a costume character once a month (locations may vary). For me the costume character is a perk because I love pictures. The whole idea reminds me of Disneyland in a way.

Before you jump on your calendars to start planning your first playgroup trip, take these tips into considration.

• Call ahead; you might be able to plan a specail one just for your group
• Advise the staff that ages of your children's ages and tolerance. (a bunch of two year olds are not going to sit and listen to stories with three or more full sentences on each page)
• Make sure your members are aware of the enviroment. This is a sit down activity, and some (who have wildly active children) may not realize how much work it will be for them

Remember to take pictures and send them in! I would love to hear about your storytimes!